Month: August 2014

Life, upsetting vegetarians and a funny side effect.

Posted on Updated on

So, one of the entries in my weird notebook was

“buying pigs ears as a gift would be well recieved.”

So, one day after finishing work I was wandering around Sainsbury’s and saw pigs ears, and immediately my mind went into overdrive with how funny it would be to buy pigs ears as a gift for a vegetarian friend.
So I did.

I then stopped by their house, and as I entered the room threw everyone a pigs ear. My vegetarian friend was a little bemused and thought it funny when another friend shouted “I’m Jewish” and my brain caught up, I’d completely forgotten about the fact she was Jewish, and as it turns out, whilst she thought it was funny it was still a shock to her. We didn’t know each other too well at this point and it really broke the ice for someone who would become a good friend.

What was also cool is that the pigs ears just wouldn’t go away, despite them being thrown away frequently, they just kept turning up, I suspect someone must have been buying them and planting them to maintain the joke, but even now I’d bet there’s a pigs ear somewhere in that house, probably in the cellar

Life, finding cool things again

Posted on Updated on

So, something cool popped up in my sorting of the house, and here it is


When I was at uni myself and a friend were up late one night talking crap and decided it would be really good to have a notebook always handy for recording those stupid conversations and great ideas (normally brought on by alcohol). So we bought each other a notebook, I got him one with an ugly looking frog on the front, and he got me this, complete with some awesome pictures of him being weird.


This book then became my jotting pad for all sorts of weird stuff that came into my head. Unfortunately it never got filled, because weirdly having the book almost became a barrier to the process, but some good stuff was there and future posts will likely record some of it



This was a cool addition my friend made to page one, a map of the earth. Knowing my propensity to upset people of other nationalities with broad crass generalisations about them and their culture that just happened to be true enough not to fall into ignorance or racism he gave me an opportunity to cross those countries off the map

Films, Robocop

Posted on Updated on

So, recently I watched the Robocop remake and I can’t remember it, I’m sure I said it was ok but just not the same. Tonight I watched the original

Yeah, it’s really shit, but it’s also really awesome. The satire is sharp, and has over twenty something years become even sharper, and the gore and mindless violence does a lot to hide it. No, not hide it, but disguise it. You know it’s in your face but that’s ok because someone’s just had his hand blown off.

Yeah, I really enjoyed watching it. So i said I’d be in bed shortly (to my partner of course) but Robocop 2 is there so I can’t guarantee it.

Then again it’s just loaded up and the bright blue armour is a put off

Life, am I a latent pool player?

Posted on Updated on

So, I’m sat here watching a few old fellas playing pool and I’m reminiscing. I suck, normally when I play I’m not wearing my glasses so can’t see the end of the table, but even with them on I suck. This of course is aside from the fact that I haven’t played in about two years.
It wasn’t always that bad, well it was, I was always crap, but once upon a time- at uni- I would play weekly at the strangely unpopular £1 a pint Tuesday nights at the student union, when the table was normally empty. I improved over the 18 months we played, but still lost far more often than I won.
But now I’m sitting watching a game and can see every single shot they plan to make.

so am I latently good?

I would say no, latent means nothing without some actual ability- and practice of course.
But I’m watching and I can see every shot. And it goes beyond that. When a shot fails I can see what they wanted and this isn’t like watching a near miss and thinking they wanted to pot that, but seeing where they wanted the ball to finish.

Next time I’m in the pub alone (most of the times I’m there) I may just fire a pound in the table and see what I can do.

Writings, warhammer 40,000 role play part 5

Posted on Updated on

So, yet another batch of role play posts

Lorenzo was in a bad way, Palgrys could see that even without his apothecary experience.
The countless breaks and cuts from fighting the carnifex were bad enough, the lost hand an issue, but nothing I’m comparison to the hole burnt through his chest. His second heart had been torn apart and a hole burnt clean through to his armour generator.
He was alive and his body had clotted the blood, but he’d entered a coma, likely unconsciously.
Palgrys’ own injuries were severe too, although he’d escaped major injury against the carnifex, the beams from the necrons weapon had caused some serious damage both to his armour and body. And his narthecium had been damaged against the ‘fex.

Things were not looking good, and emperor knew where D’Antine had gone. Something was unusual too, when he’d first seen him his armour had been red and battered by the tyranid, when he’d gone it was blue, and intact.
Lorenzo first, Palgrys told himself. Fix him up and we’ll do it together


Palgrys had been openly voxing his request for some time, not expecting a response, but hopeful of extraction from somewhere. Lorenzo was stabilised, though he’d need extensive bionics if he survived his injuries.
D’Antine had disappeared and Palgrys didn’t expect him to return anytime soon. In the meantime he had collected up as many Boltgun shells as he could from various stasis chambers and damaged “exhibits” and was ready to move once he could get Lorenzo conscious and coherent again

“I am Apothecary Palgrys of the Soul Drinkers chapter, this is Sergeant Lorenzo of the Crimson Fists, I’d rate his chances of survival at roughly 30% without assistance, my narthecium was damaged taking down a Carnifex and I can only administer basic aid. My injuries are also substantial, so any protective aid you can offer will be most appreciated. Sergeant Lorenzo seems to be rousing and I can keep him moving at a slightly slower pace, at least for the foreseeable.
We must find communication with outside forces or in failing that a method of destroying these necrons”

“Your help is appreciated,” Palgrys said diplomatically, keen to avoid further tension, with the grey area that was his chapter still a potential issue, and the potential for real trouble if D’Antine reappeared he knew he needed all the allies he could get, “rendezvousing with imperial forces would seem the best option.”
Palgrys helped the rousing Lorenzo to his feet and supported his walking as they prepared to move out. Lorenzo was barely coherent but his marine biology was doing it’s best. Palgrys himself knew his body was at it’s limit too, but with additional forces future exertions should be less intense

D’Antine could have been walking moments, or an eternity, it didn’t matter. He needn’t trouble himself with any concept as basic as time now. Not now he was refreshed and restored.
The voices in the immaterium has promised much, he wasn’t stupid, he knew he couldn’t trust them, but they thought he could be trusted, so why not use him.
Why not let them think he’d be their pawn, the only truth was his body had been close to death, his armour useless. But his mind was alive, and it had bargained, it had fooled the voices into healing the body, replacing the armour, and filling his memories, all those gaps ten thousand years of Imprisonment created. He now saw what had come of his legion, smashed by those filthy wolves, Russ and his dogs. Let down by the emperor, fooled by the voices.
But he was better than that, he knew,.
He knew he was capable of beating them, because he was loyal to the emperor, and he would not falter.
He had reached his destination

D’Antine had done it.
He’d found what he’d been sent for.
He’d flicked the switch on a bank of lights and completed whatever requirement the voices had demanded for the restoration of his body and armour.
Daemons, not voices, he knew that. And he’d used their promises against them, what was flicking a few switches compared to being restored.
Ahead of him a light grew stronger, something was happening, a green glow was building.
This must be what the daemons wanted. Never mind, he was restored, now he could go about contacting the imperium. Perhaps he’d go back for the other space marines

this is the end, at least for now. The other participants haven’t been active and I don’t want to go nuts on posts, so we’ll see what happens

Writings, warhammer 40k role play part 4

Posted on Updated on

so, another load

Palgrys was climbing to his feet as another bolt sliced through his ceramite armour, lancing into his side and throwing him down again

Lorenzo reloaded his Boltgun and charged firing at the lychguard, his power weapon buzzing with electrical energy

Palgrys raised himself up, knowing his injury was bad, feeling blood running down the inside of his armour, his marine biology slowly clotting, but somehow restricted by the energy of the blast that his him.
Raising his bolter he unleashed shells at the necron lychguard to cover Lorenzo.

Lorenzos power sword thrummed as he reached the lychguard and swung the blade heavily at the necrons waist.

D’Antines armour had finished it’s knitting, the pale blue colour now shining over the armour. Gold trim had been finished and his proud looking helmet floated from the rubble and attached at the neck.
He raised up feeling more powerful than he ever had, his deal with the voices in the immaterium having fixed up his body and armour.

Rising from the ground he summoned his psychic powers to him, testing his body and feeling energy thrum through him. His attention switched to the necron Lorenzo was engaged with, unleashing a blast of flame hotter than anything he had ever summoned before

As Lorenzo charged the lychguard a white light enveloped it, and his helmet display when white. Immediately he pulled up not wanting to get close, he saw the necrons weapon slam into the floor infront of him, taking just a second to realise it would have cut right through him, he slammed his power sword straight forward at the off balanced necrons exposed face.

D’Antine stopped blasting and stepped towards the necron. He could see Lorenzo was in no fit state for a close quarters battle and had to help, refocusing he sent deadly energy coursing through his force sword.

Palgrys stepped gingerly forward, not in any position to help anyone right now, he slammed his narthecium into his exposed side and injected a painkilling drug into his scorched flesh.
Looking back up he was shocked to see D’Antine blasting flame at the necron, his injuries shouldn’t have taken that exertion. His armour was also fully repaired inexplicably. He then took in Lorenzo, in a far worse state engaged with a necron. Palgrys held his breath as the necron very nearly cut Lorenzo in half, only for Lorenzo to back out at the last second.
Hefting his narthecium and bolter he moved painfully forward ready for a fight

Lorenzo backed away from a swing at his hands, unfortunately his already damaged body and armour slower him and his right arm was sliced clean through at the wrist.
Grunting in pain he hefted his power sword (in his left) and swung it in and the chest of the necron.

D’Antine saw lorenzos gauntleted hand bounce away and disregarded it has the necron infront of him came into reach, psychic energy thrummed through the blade as he slammed it through the chest of the creature

Palgrys stumbled, the painkillers had kicked in and his body finally clotted, but he was weakened, the blast has done some serious damage to him, he watched Lorenzo lose a hand and D’Antine step in beside him. He was angry at himself for being too slow to reach them

Lorenzo felt his body clotting his wrist as his power sword thrummed through the necron, before he could drag his blade away a metal fist clamped around his throat, crushing the already damaged joint. Making to pull away he lost balance as the necron pulled the other way and dragged him onto his weapon. Lorenzo dropped his sword as the necrons rod smashed through his ceramite and through his second heart, continuing and stopping only at the power generator on his back

D’Antine powered energy through his force sword before lurching backwards from the flailing grip of the necron. Lorenzo wasn’t quick enough and had been impaled through the chest. Tearing his force sword from the necron he aimed a downward thrust at the creatures neck.

Palgrys staggered to the combat, just in time to see Lorenzo dragged onto a necron weapon, he aimed his bolter and unleashed more shells at the necron before moving to lorenzos side

The necron disappeared and D’Antine allowed his energy to seep away, his breathing heavy but his body restored

Lorenzo dropped heavily to the ground as the necrons staff disappeared, leaving a void through his chest which was immediately filled with blood.

Palgrys dropped down painfully next to Lorenzo, straining to roll him to his front
“D’Antine help me…”

D’Antine lowered his gaze, taking in Lorenzo and the apothecary, his cold voice grated from his helmet, “you can’t help him apothecary, he will die shortly.”
“D’Antine, he helped you, now help me.”
“Apothecary, you’ll be better served helping yourself, your injuries look serous too. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a task I will return later.”
D’Antine stalked away and Palgrys was left to tend Lorenzo alone.

Quotes, perfection

Posted on Updated on

So, another quote I enjoyed. I saw this written on the back of some hippy at a weird music festival.

once you realise how perfect everything is you will tilt your head back and laugh at the sky

Now, I suspect being high would give even more meaning to this, as it happens I wasn’t, but something about it resonated.
I think too many people spend too much time not appreciating the perfect thing, and not enough time forgetting about the bad.

It’s become especially pertinent to me now that the bad probably outweighs the perfect- in quantity, not quality.

Maybe Iv missed some even deeper meaning, but it’s still nice.