So, my third read of Tom Holt’s fantasy comedy series- earth air fire and custard. It has become apparent that Tom holt has written these books with a very vague plan, as events shift and continue to become more and more convoluted as they progress- even more complicated book to book.
It’s amazing to realise Paul Carpenter only took his job a year ago yet has managed to die several times and become tangled up in various events where office politics has moved from backbiting to outright violence and murder attempts. After the events of the previous books everything begins to settle into place for Paul, with a promotion and pay rise before a goblin christening sees him in trouble as events become more and more overwhelming for him and he ends up in a sideways universe called custard space where everything’s just a little different.
I enjoyed this one, the regular deaths were well written- as was the dialogue between Mr Dao (deaths gatekeeper) and Paul getting sharper with every visit. The love story between Paul and shoe felt a little weak as it was the third time revisiting the same struggles. It all feels a little too copy paste and I’d rather they just broke up if they couldn’t develop themselves further.
The custard space bit was wacky and added a new element to the story (and existence) allowing for the usual chaos to become increasingly more manic with multiple Paul’s running around and a mysteriously appearing goblin called Colin appearing at the wrong moments. I’d have liked to have seen more of Rosie Tanner as she’s always a fun element to the books, but hopefully she’ll see more pages in the next one
So, after finishing The Portable Door by Tom Holt I immediately moved onto the sequel, in your dreams. At the end of the portable door Paul Carpenter had finally got the girl so I anticipated him messing things up very soon into this book.
Turns out I was wrong, he didn’t actually do anything wrong, she left him. What follows is Paul trying his best to cope without her, whilst also getting caught up on the quite literal war of office politics, plus of course making sure he was out do the door before the goblins came out to play.
This book did something sequels often do, it got longer. Much much longer, which I’m never sure I like. If I like a book I will likely order the sequel, but to find it significantly longer always worries me that what attracted me to the first book will be stretched and/or absent from the second. Fortunately I was wrong in this case, there was no stretching, instead more events were included adding to Paul’s suffering. I believe I’d read this previously as some moments felt very familiar, but my memory didn’t retain much so it was good to go through the twists and turns without knowing what’s coming next. Another reason to keep your eyes open in charity shops.
So, I haven’t read a Ben Elton book for a few years, but the first I read- Stark- was excellent. Whilst on holiday in Wales I came across Meltdown in the cottage bookcase so took it, placing a few of my read books in its place.
The book focuses on a group of friends who were carried along on the 90s financial boom, all making a lot of money, and subsequently losing it when the global recession takes it all away. The primary focus is on a stock trader who borrows against everything he owns to make more money, and ends up defaulting due to the complete loss of funds. He was a bit of a dick but you still felt almost sorry for him.
The story was ok, nowhere near the standard of stark, but it had Ben Eltons usual smart social commentary, which felt as though it was accurate and cut close to the bone. The big criticism id have is that it jumped forward a few too many times, missing the conversations that were needed to fully expand on the characters during consequences.
So, I always laugh at Rox for reading and rereading the same books over and over, but Iv just reread The Portable Door by Tom Holt. With a holiday fast approaching I didn’t fancy anything on my to read shelf, so browsed around and found this one. “Iv read some Tom Holt before” I thought and promptly ordered it, and only on its arrival did I realise this was the Tom Holt book Id read. Fortunately as I read I couldn’t remember how it ended, and even now it’s only starting to come back to me that I do indeed know the story.
The story focuses on Paul Carpenter, who is interviewing for a job with a company he knows nothing about, depressed in the knowledge he hasn’t got a chance of getting the job. However, somehow he does indeed get the job alongside an equally inept woman who automatically becomes the love of his life due to her being female and forced to sit in a small office with him. The job progresses dully before gradually becoming more and more peculiar and strange, when Paul realises things aren’t quite so boring and ordinary as he thought.
I enjoyed reading this, especially as I couldn’t remember the ending, which was vital as it all got a little crazy. The main character as a complete loser is a fairly common template, but it was handled well, with several moments of me mentally shouting at him to just shut up and do something about each current predicament / pathetic situation.
The fantasy situations were a little tame, but I suspect as the Company needed to get weirder it was also a growing level of curiosity for the reader as well as the completely moronic Paul Carpenter.
Due to the holiday being relaxed and providing a fair amount of time to read I was able to get started on the sequel so look forward to that review coming soon
So, it isn’t often a recommendation from my friend gareth gets any serious attention, he’s got a reputation for poor taste despite is sharing many interests. However, he actually bought me a copy of Ready Player One by Ernest Cline and sent it to me so I would read it and as it arrived between books I went straight into it, despite a dull blurb
The book is set forty years from now when poverty, squalor and energy deficits has resulted in the majority of people ‘living’ in a virtual reality computer program where anything is possible. A young man called Wade lives as Parzival, a student, but doesn’t have the income to do a great deal within the game- not that it stops him spending all his time there. In doing so he stumbled upon a hidden area and solves a clue to the ownership of the game. The creator died years before and set up Easter eggs within the game to give users the opportunity to discover them and take inheritance of the entire gaming system. Parzival’s discovery kindles interest in the quest and soon he’s in a race against other in game characters to find the next clue before they do.
The book was really entertaining to read, largely due to the constant stream of 80s and 90s pop culture references, creating a nostalgic experience. This also keeps the story interesting at points when things slow down as the brain constantly searches out obscure memories.
Towards the end things became a little predictable and formulaic, but it still threw in a few shocks and twists to keep things not entirely dull.
Without the pop culture references it’s possible the story would be incredibly dull, yet as they’re an essential story point it isn’t an issue.
so, despite my issues deciding what I want to read I’m still hitting the short stories regulary
The first in a related trilogy published in The Carnac Campaign, this story focuses on Illic Nightspear and his eldar exiles attempting to ambush an awakening necron force. Unfortunately it goes wrong and becomes a race back to their webway portal before the Necron Deathmarks kill them all. This story was basically pants. There was no real insight into a major character of the Eldar, no real background or insight into the history of the exiles, Rangers or characters and no actual story. Illic lines up a kill shot, necrons disappear, necrons ambush the ambushers. Beyond that point it became an exercise in introducing an Eldar before having him killed by necrons, there wasn’t even any detail to that. I’m hoping it was acting as a prologue to a meatier story in the other two short stories but I’m not holding my breath.
Sky Hunter by Graeme Lyon. 40k
Well that’s the way to drag me right back into interested. Set fairly soon after Nightspear this story focuses on the pilots of Eldar- the Crimson hunters and the pilots of the hemlock wraith fighters which apparently the Eldar consider to be anything from heretical an abomination, but that have a use against such foes as the Necrons. The story jumps quickly from character to character opening up so many distraught personalities before a segment in which a spiritseer jumps (mentally) from mind to mind of various warriors on the battlefield of Carnac witnessing death and destruction through the eyes and bodies of basically every kind of Eldar warriors in the armies Codex army book. Far better than Nightspear with a large set up for the final story of the noon. However I’m leaving that one for the moment to catch up on a different book.
The Sound that Wakes You by Ben Chessell. Fantasy
A small forgotten village on the outskirts of Bretonnia is ruled by a tyrannical former knight and his henchmen. Everyone accepts this as the norm except the troublesome son of a blacksmith, he gets a bit overexcited and attempts to start a rebellion by burning a rose bush and his father is killed before he realises acceptance isn’t the same as patience. It was ok, no real surprises and the ending was too obvious, but it was an ok little tale of Bretonnia. It feels a bit weird reading these now that The End Times are coming and the relevance will be gone, it’ll be interesting to see where the background is taken.
Spirit War by Rob Sanders. 40k
After reading the previous two stories in the Carnac Campaign book I’d had a poor experience and a better one so was interested to see where a longer ‘short story’ would go. This one sets an army of Wraithguard, Wraithblades and Wraithlords against a Necron invasion force. The ‘dead’ warriors are sent to hold back the Necrons until Eldar civilians can retreat from the world via a Webway portal. This story could have been an interesting conflict between two unliving forces, but instead just seemed to be a blur of action without giving enough detail to actually explain what was happening. When the story reached a ‘last stand’ of the Wraiths I really lost interest.
A geneticist in prison for breaking too many ethical boundaries is freed and whisked off to an obscure tropical island by a rich sponsor who wants him to complete his research, but his motives aren’t purely financial. This was a four page short story (so genuinely a short story) and initially felt a little too much like a standard accusation levelled at big pharmaceutical companies funding research outside of the law, but the twist midway through suggested some additional potential consequences of genetic manipulation. The twist made it very enjoyable.
When you’re trusted with showing a potential donator a good time and he’s assassinated what do you do? Strap him to you and fight through a city of other assassins of course. This one was stupid, but a really fun read- as well as revisiting Dubnitz of Mananns blades.
The Mouth of Chaos by Chris Dows. 40k
An Elysian Imperial Guard force drop into a fortified volcano to take out a rebel force. The idea was very James Bondesque, and it worked well initially as the high speed drop allowed for a fast pace, however the lack of breaks in the text meant it felt too much. Perhaps if I’d read it through in one sitting I’d have enjoyed the non stop pace, but as its a human force I don’t want superhuman stamina. There was a nice Imperial Guard moment at the end as the debriefing leads into the briefing for the next war zone as the survivors are directed into another battle.
The Butchers Beast by Jordan Ellinger. Fantasy
A unit of Imperial Greatswords hold the line against the forces of chaos, post battle a chaos monstrosity rampages through their camp, bringing the attentions of a vindictive Witch Hunter. The story felt too much as though it had been taken from 40k, with the witch hunters replacing the inquisition.
So, recently Iv been feeling some apathy towards warhammer 40,000- so long playing other game systems and probably overexposure to the offerings of the black library have dulled my interest. This coupled with the constant stream of releases (most quite good) it’s felt as though 40k is everywhere. However, upon being dragged to Cribbs Causeway I popped into the Games Workshop and was handed some cash by Rox. With a painting backlog of probably years it was books.
Fantasy is about to he reset so the books are in short supply, so instead it was 40k only, one of which was Khârn Eater of Worlds by Anthony Reynolds. Set after the Horus Heresy the armies of Chaos are scatter and divided with no leaders of note anywhere to be found. This book naturally focuses on the World Eaters, barbaric bloodthirsty Astartes who are turning on each other and bleeding their numbers dry. Unfortunately the one man (marine) who could unite them is dead: yeah, that’s right Khârn starts the book dead, dragged from a pile of Imperial Fist corpses on Terra he’s been enshrined on a ship within the World Eaters fleet. I say dead, he isn’t strictly speaking dead- but when he was picked up he was. Now his body functions barely function and his brain activity is negligible, enough to keep his heart beating and his lungs breathing.
With the Workd Eaters dying a power struggle ensued and an anonymous warrior arranges an assassination attempt on Khârns corpse. This is at the midway point of the book.
Something happens and Khârn lives and wakes up, just in time to encounter the remainder of the Emperors Children legion and be involved with the tensions between the legion.
The book didn’t do much to reinvigorate my 40k excitement, I had hoped for a book of Khârn slaughtering anything and everything, but instead got a book in which he plays barely more than a bit part role, and instead focusing on his lackies and hangers on. Even the battle towards the end of the book (two chapters worth) was from the perspective of others, barely hinting at Khârn doing anything.
In addition, SPOILER ALERT AHEAD…
The idea that Khârn would reunite the World Eaters had potential- who better to lead an out of control Warband of berserkers- the first thing he did was lead them into a war against the Emperors Children- equal in stature yet far outnumbered, so the hoped for prevention of them killing each other instead led to them losing far greater numbers against a superior foe, further restricting their capabilities. Given the lack of new recruits and apothecaries replenishing the force seems unlikely.
So, The End Times is done. I finished the Lord of the end times by Josh Reynolds. It’s hard to say how I feel about it as one or two rumours left it a little predictable, even before the book spent a lot of time telling us the world was ending.
The books set into three sections, as Middenheik falls, the incarnates plot and finally the plan to save the world is set into motion. However the three sections as far simpler-
Part one is a seemingly endless stream of cameo appearances as a means of covering pretty much everyone and killing them. If a models metal or finecast there’s a high probability they’re killed in part one. A few plastic models get killed too. Part two is a political battle between the remaining ‘heroes’ or ‘incarnates’ as nobody can decide what to do next, whilst beastmen hordes which have turned feral hurl themselves at the forest the forces of order are holding. Finally part three throws the remainders of the humans, dwarves, elves, orcs and undead into the wreckage of Middenheim to save the world- another chance to kill off characters before the climax.
The book was ok, the first section at first annoyed me, but the fast pace felt as though it were segments of battle as opposed to a conveyor belt of death. The politics of part two were a nice change of pace, though the beastmen assaults felt a distraction from the key plot more than anything. Finally the ‘final battle’ was ok, it was probably the weakest part of the book but in fairness ending a series is always tough. I felt the ending should have been less predictable- or at least not been heavily hinted at from the start.
A few interesting paragraphs came up
This felt like either a nod towards the approach taken in 40k- keeping the universe on the edge of ruin and maintaining that position. The idea of TheEnd Times has long been anticipated within 40k but never happened, instead happening in warhammer fantasy.
This a hint at the creation of the next works perhaps? The potential to create a whole new world is of course interesting instead of trying to shoehorn new elements to a long established timeline. The cynical side of me could read it as ‘less burdened by the previous designers and their creative properties’ but I think I’ll see it more as ‘less burdened by poorly selling lines (and armies)’
The series overall has been interesting, the killing off of so many established characters (and entire forces) is a brave step and hopefully has a long term consideration in place, whilst the entire resetting of the lore and background has the potential to upset a lot of long time fans. Having said that the fresh page approach should allow for a lot of freedom to create something brilliant.
My feeling on the series is that is was far too rushed, whilst the book contents were about right so many events were skimmed over or completely ignored (I hear more information was in the gaming books but I’m not spending £50-£70 on books I won’t use/ won’t need all of/ will be obsolete in a few months). Whilst a series that lingered on forever (Horus heresy) would stagnate I’d want a few more books to ensure everyone gets a final story. It would also have allowed for more spacing of deaths to prevent things feeling like a clear out.
So, four books down only one remaining. Iv just finished the rise of the horned rat by Guy Haley. This one moves away from the chaos invasion of the empire to focus on Karak Eight Peaks and the ongoing war between the dwarves, goblins and Skaven- specifically the leaders of the respective armies; belegar, skarsnik and Queek headtaker.
Overwhelming skaven force has evicted the goblins whilst the dwarfs grudgingly retreat further and further into their caves. Deaths occur on all sides and speed up the further you get into the book. What’s interesting is the inner monologues of the three main characters all focus on the passage of time and age/death catching up with them, meaning The End Times takes on a smaller more personal level.
The story was ok, combining numerous elements of the ‘traditional’ plot elements of the various armies and dropping in a whole host of characters from other books- highlights include Thanquol and Bugman, whose major contribution was to suggest a ‘world ending’ (read edition ending) wasn’t a huge deal
I’m now at a point where I have one more End Times book to read, but a, feeling a bit fatigued with the constant warhammer fantasy reading, so it may be a while before I get to it (but before the end of the month just in case of edition changing spoilers)